The Man With A Long Chin's Diary


Walk On! With Pat Walker


18 December 1993 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

"I couldn't have hoped for a better Christmas present" writes new Databank proprietor, Pat Walker.

"My mobile disco caught alight last Monday, and most of my singles were warped by the heat!"

"When I played them, the needle slipped around. Nasty."

22 December 1993 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

How are your Christmas plans going? I'm hoping to have some friends over for dinner. My best mate, Gary Clark, said he'd come, but none of the others have replied yet.

Still, old "Clarkuss" is usually good for a laugh, so no matter what happens, this'll be a great Christmas!

24 December 1993 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

I've just had a bit of a disappointment, pals. My mate, Gary Clark, has told me he's not going to be able to make it for Christmas.

Apparently his mum got upset when he said he wasn't going there.

Still, there are some great progs on the box. Got and game!

25 December 1993 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

Wow, what a Christmas! I did the sounds for a party on the 24th, and didn't get in till gone midnight! And I got a free bottle of wine into the bargain!

And I totally pigged-out whilst watching Only Fools and Horses!

I was nearly sick!

29 December 1993 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

I really like this bit in between Christmas and New Year. I still feel in the festive swing, and there are plenty of cold meats left over!

I didn't do a turkey this year as I was on my 'tod', but Clarkuss is coming over later with some honey-cured ham slices. And probably some 'vino'!

1 January 1994 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

Sorry about the mess, viewers, but I had to do the music at a New Year party, and got into a spot of bother.

Four local kids said I looked like a rooster and hit me with a heavy chain, then legged it.

My mate, Gary "Clarkuss" Clark, patched me up good.

Anyway, on behalf of all of us here at Walk On!, I'd like to wish you a happy and prosperous new year."

I hope you have better luck than I've had recently, what with the fire, and the fight.

Oh, and "Clarkuss" wishes you a top 1994. Got and game!

7 January 1994 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

So, how has the year gone for you so far, vid-o game pals? I've been playing that Sonic Combat game ever since I bought it last week.

Yeah, it's full of colourful characters and wild animals, that pop-up and bite you.

Is that what you wanted me to say?

11 January 1994 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

My pipes burst the other night, and I've yet to call out the plumber, so I'll have to make this quick.

My mate, "Clarkuss", has been helping move my disco gear round to his flat, 'cos some of it was getting wet, and I can't afford to lose any more stuff. Got and game!

18 January 1994 - WALK ON! WITH PAT WALKER

I was having a shave last night, when I dropped my electric razor in the sink.

When I tried to use it again, I got such a shock that most of my body hair fell out, and I ended up having to visit the hospital.

And my hands are still shaking.

18 January 1994 - CHIN ON! WITH MAN WALKER

I never knew this, but my face is made out of wax. I discovered that last night when I fell asleep on my three-bar electric fire.

The lower portion of my face slowly melted and began to sag. As you can see, it has given me the appearance of a man - a man with a long chin.


Well, it would seem that I was never Walker all along.

This has already caused a few problems with "Clarkuss".

Firstly, he won't stop crying, and then on top of all this, he stops crying!

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