Stuntman Wants A Console
20 December 1997
Happy... 1, 2, 3... BIRTHDAY!
I love this time of year, because it gives me the chance to pretend to be a stuntman and ring shops to play tricks on them and stuff.
Remember, though: phone jokes aren't just for Christmas - if you get carried away, you can go to prison for doing them. This is why I never reveal it's a joke phonecall until I have hung up the phone. I just shout out the truth so that everyone in the room can hear me! Shop name = false name.
"SUPER GAMES", CENTRAL LONDON
US: Hello, this is Joey McShane. I'm trying to get a computer for my kid.
SG: Do you mean a PC?
US: What the whatnot now? All I want is to get a computer, mate. You know, with Sonic The Hedgehog and that.
SG: So you want a Saturn?
US: I haven't sat on anything.
SG: No, sir. I mean, are you wanting to get a Saturn console?
US: I don't want to buy one that's been sat on. I want a new one.
SG: It's called the Saturn - like the planet. You want to buy a console called the Saturn?
US: Pluto is a planet.
SG: What console did you want, sir?
US: A computer for my boy.
SG: I would recommend you get a console which is... how old is your boy?
US: He's 12.
SG: You should get him a PlayStation. That's got Tomb Raider on it.
US: It's got what all over it?
SG: Tomb Raider. It's the name of a game.
US: Never heard of him. How much is it likely to cost me?
SG: The PlayStation value pack is about 130 quid.
US: Has it got big buttons?
SG: They're quite big.
US: Because I only get to see my boy three times a year, and I want to play the games with him. I need big buttons because of me fingers.
SG: Right...
US: My fingers are all puffy and hairy!
SG: Sorry, I've got to go. There's a customer waiting to be served.
US: You do know who I am don't you?
SG: Er... who are you?
US: I'm Joey - Joey The Stuntman! My years of doing stunts have taken their toll on my fingers, which is why I need a machine with big buttons.
SG: Ok. I've got to go. Bye.
US: Happy Easter!
Do you know of any important moments from the annals of Digi history that have been omitted? If so, then mail me (superpage58@gmail.com) right now, man. Credit will be duly given for anything that gets put up.
