The Man With A Long Chin's Diary

 

"Stellar Games" - Regular Customer

11 July 1998

Pingu! Hey, you - Piiingu! I'm Phoning Honey, the green-faced guy who uses his phone to call up games shops to play a series of rib-tinkering scams. On them. Is?

This week I called a nearby shop, posing as a regular customer having first obtained the names of certain members of staff. The point of this exercise? There is no point - that's the whole point of this exercise! The names have been changed, of course... to Pingu!

"STELLAR GAMES", CENTRAL LONDON

US: All right? Is that Cam?

SG: No, I'll just get him.

US: It's OK. Who's that?

SG: This is Dean.

US: All right, Dean? It's Bradley.

SG: Bradley who?

US: Bradley. Bradley with the goatee and bad haircut.

SG: I don't know anyone called. Bradley.

US: It's Bradley.

SG: I don't know who you are.

US: Well, I was playing King Of Fighters with you last week.

SG: Were you? When?

US: Last week, man. You remember? I whupped your butt.

SG: But I didn't play King Of Fighters last week. I've never played it.

US: Are you saying you don't have any idea who I am?

SG: Yes. No. I mean, maybe I just didn't know your name was Bradley. Do you come in here often?

US: All the time, man.

SG: What do you want, anyway?

US: I wanted to challenge you to another game of King Of Fighters.

SG: I've never played it - ever! I don't know who you are.

US: Are you pulling my leg?

SG: No. I don't know who you are. I'm sure I've never played any game against you. I've never known a Bradley.

US: Heh he heh.

SG: Why are you laughing?

US: I'm laughing at your funny voice.

SG: Who is this really? Is that Richard's mate?

US: Heh heh heh heh heh.


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