Village Policeman
18/4/97-19/4/97
18 April 1997 - VILLAGE POLICEMAN
I went to the local pub last night in an attempt to blend in with the villagers, but I don't think it worked.
All went well, and I was chatting cheerfully to John Horseshape the butcher, when I suddenly got drunk and became violent. I threatened Horseshape with an ashtray, and kicked two tables over. Then I started punching the dartboard and tore it off the wall. Finally, I pushed a plant over and rolled in the soil. I wish stuff like this wouldn't happen.
19 April 1997 - VILLAGE POLICEMAN
Nothing ever happens in this stupid village. I've been forced to fake crimes, so the villagers don't think I'm being lazy.
Last night I dressed a horse up as a bank robber and chased it around the village green. Later, I broke into the newsagents and changed all the headlines on the newspapers to read "Village Cop Stops Crimes". Then I drew a picture of a arsonist on a tree and pretended to arrest it.
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