19 April 1997 - VILLAGE POLICEMAN
Nothing ever happens in this stupid village. I've been forced to fake crimes, so the villagers don't think I'm being lazy.
Last night I dressed a horse up as a bank robber and chased it around the village green. Later, I broke into the newsagents and changed all the headlines on the newspapers to read "Village Cop Stops Crimes". Then I drew a picture of a arsonist on a tree and pretended to arrest it.