The Man With A Long Chin's Diary

 

Time Travel

23/8/94-30/8/94

23 August 1994 - TIME TRAVEL

I was clearing all the pelican wax off of the Professor's time machine last night, when my lungs fell out onto the control stick.

The machine swooped into life, and I was dragged across the room by the "Time Beatles".


24 August 1994 - TIME TRAVEL

I have arrived in the olden year 500 BC. I was taken prisoner by a caveman called Roland Russell, and his wife, Harrison Stetler.

They dragged me into a small cave, where I was forced to drink 9 pints of wood pulp.


29 August 1994 - TIME TRAVEL

My adventures have brought me to the space year 2004 AD.

Scientific advances mean that man can now live on bread alone. Also, there is a mewing sound coming from the TV. It seems that this is all the entertainment "future people" require.


30 August 1994 - IN THE FUTURE

In the space year 2017 AD, Man has developed a method of milking cows by slapping their bums with a hand towel.

In addition to this, all food now drips from street lamps, and is swallowed up by the hungry masses, who spray it straight back.


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