
The Invisible Man With A Long Chin
16/4/94-22/4/94
16 April 1994 - THE INVISIBLE MAN WITH A LONG CHIN
Look, I'm wearing my new contact lenses.
What you can't see is that my eyes are bloodshot due to my forgetting to neutralise the disinfecting solution before putting them in. My eyes are swollen, like two bullfrogs strapped to a "pinky pinta".
19 April 1994 - THE INVISIBLE MAN WITH A LONG CHIN
In an attempt to pass myself off as normal, I've taken to wearing an absurd pair of false lips, which I found floating in the River Thames.
I scraped the mud and silt away, and now they almost look attractive. I'll be down there tomorrow with a fishing net.
22 April 1994 - THE INVISIBLE MAN WITH A LONG CHIN
I've been using a heated fork to re-shape my damaged face. As you can see, my efforts have been less than successful.
I am trying to raise enough money for plastic surgery, but my ex-friend, Gary "Clarkuss" Clark, has been spreading dirty rumours about me.
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