Ghost Train
18/7/98-24/7/98
18 July 1998 - GHOST TRAIN
I've got a new job operating a ghost train at a local fun fair. It's not bad work, but we get a lot of complaints that it isn't scary enough.
I can see their point, though. The whole thing only lasts about 30 seconds, and all that's inside is one of those plastic toy snakes on a stool. You know the sort. You hold it by the tail, and it's segmented, so it looks like it's moving. And it isn't even dark inside. And we couldn't get a copy of Michael Jackson's "Thriller", so we have to play "Billy Jean".
24 July 1998 - GHOST TRAIN
The authorities have closed down my ghost train. They tell me it's become little more than "a tawdry seafront peepshow with trains and drunk tramps". The final straw for the council came when one of my "zombies" (tramps) climbed into a train full of nuns and tried to kiss them.
The nuns were so disturbed by the incident that one decided to be a druid, one an anarchist, and a third got engaged to the tramp. However, Mother Superior complained to Rex Ubermensch MP.
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